On Smokers

After going from a nice ‘Please don’t smoke near me’ to a more assertive ‘No no! You smoke here. I'll stand there,’ then graduating to a semi-aggressive-putting-my-foot-down-but-still-putting-the-onus-on-someone-else, ‘If you’re going to smoke, stay the hell away from me,’ I rose to a ‘You're smoking? Ok. I’m going to stay the hell away from you,’ and so on, I have never been more thankful for a prescription, than a few weeks ago, when it was put down in writing, by a medical practitioner (of great repute,) that I had to stay away from smokers.

That way, no one's an asshole and I can validate being an utter prude.